Ron’s Secret Bathtub

You know the old saying, “I took an arrow to the knee?” I think it comes from a video game or something. Anyway, that almost describes my current situation, although it would be more accurate to say that I took an Archer to the knees. That’s right – once again, international super spy Alloy Archer has been a complete idiot while on a mission, resulting in me having broken legs for the third time. 

Thankfully, this time we’re in Sydney, Australia, instead of one of those remote, ice-capped mountains or a desert island. Being in Sydney has its perks. It’s a beautiful city, and our temporary safe house has a rather nice bathtub. However, with my current predicament, getting in and out of it is proving to be quite a challenge. So, I decided I needed some bath modifications from a Sydney business to make it more accessible for my broken legs.

I shared my concerns with Lara, Archer’s ex-partner and voice of reason. She agreed to help me find someone who could make the necessary adjustments to the bathtub. Together, we searched for someone who could not only install safety rails and a comfortable seat but also do it discreetly. After all, we couldn’t risk blowing our cover.

Finally, we found a trustworthy handyman named Bruce, who specialised in making the perfect bathtub cut out for the elderly and those with disabilities. Bruce promised to keep the whole operation a secret. As Bruce worked on the bathtub, Archer, ever the nuisance, couldn’t help but poke fun at my situation. “Hey, Ron! How’s it going, buddy? Seriously, with those broken legs of yours, you’re like a kangaroo who can’t hop anymore!” he said, laughing obnoxiously.

Despite Archer’s teasing, I couldn’t wait to soak in that modified bathtub and enjoy the small comfort it would bring. After all, in our line of work, you’ve got to appreciate the little things – even if they’re born out of disaster.