Window Replacement Wizard

My morning began as it always does, with a cup of coffee and cream at the local cafe. My afternoon began with hot tea, complete with two lumps of sugar. And in the evening, well that’s when I changed into my pyjamas. You see, it seemed to be a perfectly regular day for me, the Window Replacement Wizard. A perfectly normal Saturday with nothing interesting to write about on my blog. If you truly believe that, then you must be fools! Of course it was not a regular, boring day. If that was the case, why would I be writing a blog post about it? By now you should know that I only write about exciting things which add to my legend, beginning all the way back in the 12th century.

So, what was interesting about my day, other than the sliding doors installation I did on my own house? Well, it didn’t seem it would be that interesting, as I have already suggested. No, the interesting thing happened only late in the day, after I had already changed into my pyjamas. I settled down on my couch to review the one thousand provisions I have written down, which people I assist with my magical abilities must adhere to. You see, people have been refusing to accept my terms of dealership, where I fix their windows and doors for free as long as they live by these provisions. So I thought I might need to get more lenient. That’s when the doorbell rang. ‘Who could it be?’ I was wondering. Somebody who desperately needed window or door replacement near Melbourne?

Not quite. Instead, it was a man who had heard about my magical abilities. Apparently, he and another man had switched bodies somehow, and they wanted me to help fix it. This “Tommy” in the body of “Lucian” said he would do anything to get his whole body back. So I handed him the list of provisions, which he is currently reading through. We’ll see if he actually means anything when he discovers we have to share a five-hour reading experience together.

– Window Replacement Wizard