I can’t help being competitive; our whole family is like that. I was raised to believe that our family is utterly superior to the entire competition in every single way, and that anyone with a different surname is a lower life form. Of course, I know that’s not true NOW, but old habits. Even in a fishing competition, which is supposedly the calmest sport in the world, I have this burning desire to lock eyes with all my opponents, hit them with one of the obscene hand gestures my father taught me as psyche-out tactics, and then spend the entire time mocking them in subtle ways. And of COURSE I’m going to be well-equipped. I got the best marine stainless steel fabrication Melbourne has to offer. The greatest money can buy, fitted out with the finest quality bait boards, in order to crush my competition to a fine powder. the only good opposition is a defeated opposition, after all. A defeated opposition, broken and mentally shattered, the finest of fine powders. Then you grind up that powder and mix it into your cup of victory and OKAY, I might be having a little bit of trouble shaking the mental conditioning. I spent way more on my boat and equipment than I should, but I kind of thought I was purging my mad urges to compete. But now I’m just wondering what will happen when I get out there on the water for the fishing competition, I’m surrounded by all my opponents…and something just awakens within me. I’ll want to quit my job and travel across the country, fishing and living on the rivers, eating from oceans. It could happen, I don’t have much to keep me on shore.
Sitting in my superior aluminium boat, with my state-of-the-art stainless steel snapper racks and bait boards, my hair all silver and glowing, tossing insults and generally being a competitive jerk. Maybe I’m not ready for this.